Category — Etiquette

Has your future mother-in-law approached you about what you want her to wear to your wedding? What about your own mother? Do you have a step-mother or even your fiancé‘s mother and step-mother coming to your wedding? It’s hard enough to choose your own wedding dress, but to be stuck having to help up to four women at the same time, too?

Obviously, not every mother will ask, but they do usually want an idea of what color or style you have envisioned. It’s also important for each mother to coordinate. There will be pictures taken of them together and the last thing you want is for their dresses to clash and draw attention away from yourself and the groom, the whole reason they bought those fancy dresses.

It’s common knowledge that mother’s should all stay away from a white or ecru ensemble. These colors can make it look like the mother of the bride or groom is trying to rival the bride.

Do consider the colors. Often mother’s will wear similar colors that are featured in your floral arrangements or accents that your bridesmaid’s wear. For example, if your colors are sage green and rose petal pink, one mother could wear green and the other pink.

As for the style of the dress, it might make for good bonding time for you to accompany each mother and help her choose what to wear. You can also help her pick out her shoes and accessories.

There are no solid rules or etiquette on what mother’s of the bride and groom should wear during the wedding ceremony. Some mothers might prefer to pick out their own attire, just make sure to lay the ground rules first. If you want them to coordinate, tell them they must work together on colors. If you are more laid back and don’t mind what they wear, try throwing out some ideas for them to spark their imagination.

When it comes to accessories and shoes, it depends on the dress being worn. A simple dress can be spruced up with more elaborate jewelry or shoes. The opposite is true for more elaborate dresses. Simpler jewelry and shoes with a fancier dress can go a long way to pull off a nice look.

Whatever the mothers during your wedding choose to wear, try to remember the big picture – to get married. Don’t get bogged down with the tiny details. If you have expectations simply make them known and relax as everything falls into place.

As your wedding date approaches, you’ll need to think about wedding invitation etiquette and what is most appropriate for the tone of your wedding. Below, you’ll find some examples for casual and formal invitations and how to implement the correct timing in order to receive the most responses.

On average, invitations should be sent three months prior to your wedding date. Perhaps the best way to establish this time is to look at your reception and/or caterer final confirmation requirements. Typically, six weeks beforehand is a good estimate. Allowing four weeks for guests to respond is good etiquette both for your wedding vendors and your guests.

Formal Wedding Invitation Etiquette:

-Write full names, including middle names. Omit middle name in lieu of an initial.
-Spell out all wording on the invitation such as the hour, date and year.
-Use black ink and a script type font
-Envelope writing is typically typed or a calligraphist is used.

The outer envelope is addressed to the household recipient. Single guests should have their full name spelled, such as Ms. or Miss Jane Doe. Couples should read Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. The same applies for doctors, judges, clergy, or military guests.

Inner envelopes define who is invited. A singles’ name is spelled Miss Jane Doe and Guest. If you do not wish for them to bring a guest, simply write Miss Jane Doe. A couple spelling omits the first name and reads Mr. and Mrs. Doe. If any children living under the household are over the age of eighteen, they should receive their own invitation. If the children are minors, their names can be listed individually on the inner envelope.

Formal weddings should always include response cards with adequate pre-paid postage. This ensures the likelihood that your guests will respond. Consider putting an RSVP date to gently remind them that there are people involved in your wedding who need to receive a head count on time.

Casual Wedding Invitation Etiquette:

-Use the same outline as above for addressing invitations.
-Okay to abbreviate hour, date and year.
-Choose fun colours or funky fonts consistent with your theme.
-handwrite your invitations or use a similar font to address the envelopes.
-put an RSVP email address and phone number.

Maintain two on-going lists as your response cards come in. This will help you keep track of who is coming and give you an easy reference for your vendors.